You have a real blind spot to name, and you want it to land
This is for you if you have a real blind spot to raise with someone good, one that keeps costing them. Maybe you've put it off once already, bracing for them to hear it as an attack and go quiet.
When feedback lands as a verdict on who someone is, they defend. It has cast them as the problem, and arguing back is all they have left.
Open their Uncovering Your Blind Spots section first. Every blind spot there is the shadow of a real strength. The wiring that makes someone decisive also makes them run past the person who needed a minute. That pairing keeps hard feedback from stinging.
Here's the move.
- Find the one blind spot that's live here. Not the whole list, just the one behind what you need to raise, and the strength it's paired with.
- Lead with the strength. Then name the cost as that same strength turned up too high: the thing that makes you great at X is what's costing you here.
- Don't tell them, draw it out. Ask what their sharp edge might cost the people around them. When they name it, it's their read, not your charge.
- Agree one guard, and let them propose it. One small, specific move for next time. Something like running the redesign past a teammate before it ships.
Done this way, the person doesn't leave smaller. They walk out with a sharper read on their own edge and one thing to try. You gave them the hard thing, and it landed.
Coaching questions
This isn't a worksheet to run in order. Once the person names their own edge, pull whatever fits.
Opening from the strength
- What do you count on this person for, at their best?
- Which strength in their results did this situation grow out of?
- How would you say the strength out loud, so they hear it as real?
Drawing out their own read
- Where might that strength, turned all the way up, cost the people around you?
- Who's usually on the receiving end when it shows up?
- What have you noticed about it yourself, before today?
Landing on one guard
- What's one small thing you could try next time this comes up?
- Where would that be easiest to actually do?
- How will we both know it's working?
